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tellitslantTitle: Hysteria
Fandom: Doctor Who
Disclaimer: All hail the Beeb.
Characters: River Song/Martha Jones
Rating: PG
Spoilers: None
Warnings: None
Word Count: 750
Summary: River takes Martha on a trip she's wanted for a long time, and learns something about Earth's history that horrifies her.
Notes: So I lost a bet tozulu recently, and as payment she demanded a River/Martha ficlet, giving the prompt "51st century curiosities." Since she just handed in her MA thesis today, I thought this would be a good time to post – congratulations!
It went against River's better judgement, but Martha had cajoled and pleaded until she finally gave in with as much grace as possible. "All right," she'd said, and Martha had flung her arms around River and kissed her. "But," River had warned, "you don't touch anything, you don't take anything, and you do not talk to anyone other than me unless absolutely necessary." Martha had nodded frantically, and now, here they were.
River brushed non-existent dirt off her coat and looked at Martha, checking that both of their disguises were put together properly. Martha smiled back, excitement shining in her eyes. River nodded, Martha pushed open the doors, and, all but unnoticeable in their short white labcoats, they walked together into the lobby of the Royal Denebian Hospital, Martha nearly dancing in anticipation of finally getting to explore the world of 51st Century medicine.
**
When they left, hours later, River was almost worn out; Martha, though, was bright and cheerful, as if being in the hospital had transported her back to her residency and the ability to stay awake around the clock. She was bubbling over with comments and questions, some of which River had no answer for, though she tried hard to keep up.
"It's so strange," Martha was saying, "to be in a hospital that didn't smell like disinfectant!"
"Mm," River agreed. "That's the decontamination shields."
"I know," Martha crowed. Beaming, she bounced through the quiet streets of New Londinium. "It's just amazing to see all the technology in person!" Quieting, she hooked an arm through River's. "I thought," she said after a moment's silence, "that everything would be different. That I'd come out having seen all the new shiny advances in medicine and never want to go back to the Royal Free."
River had worried about the same thing; it had been a large part of her reluctance to sneak Martha into the hospital in the first place. "And now?" she asked, more lightly than she felt. "Going to give it all up and join me as a space pirate?"
Martha giggled and tugged River closer, swaying into her. "Hardly! No, what really impressed me is how many of the techniques and treatments I learned are still in use here. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, there are remedies we use that've been around for centuries. Somehow I expected to find 21st Century medicine as outdated and wrong as... as... as the Victorian treatments for hysteria."
They'd reached River's rented flat by now; she stopped with the door halfway open and stared at Martha. "Treatment for hysteria?" she repeated. "What, you mean besides a good slap?"
Martha pushed past into the kitchen and put the kettle on. "It's funny now, although it wasn't for a long time, but hysteria used to be seen as a derangement of the womb – men never got emotional, of course." She pulled a face. "So in order to encourage the uterus to settle down – like, they actually thought it came detached and wandered around the body – doctors used to apply manual stimulation to calm women through hysterical paroxysm." She raised her eyebrows suggestively.
River stared, thunderstruck, letting her white coat drop onto a chair. "You can't be serious. You mean..." She trailed off, unwilling to finish the thought.
Martha nodded matter-of-factly. "Literally manual, at first." She wiggled her fingers. "Later – well, let's just say that the steam-powered exhibits in history of medicine museums put me off sex toys for a good few years."
"Tragic," River murmured. "Sometimes, your era amazes me."
"Hey, hey, not mine. We've moved past that, believe me." Martha reached into a cabinet for the mugs. "Cuppa?"
River looked at Martha, standing in the middle of the kitchen with her white lab coat still on, and smirked. She padded up to Martha and took the mugs out of her hands, setting them on the counter. "Actually, Doctor," she purred, running her fingers over the lapels of Martha's coat, "I'm feeling terribly overwrought all of a sudden. I don't think tea could possibly relax me. Do you know any other ways to help me... calm down?"
It took Martha a moment to catch up; then she grinned wickedly. "Why, Miss Song," she said, "I'm happy to help. I think I know exactly what you need. Why don't you come in here and lie down..."
Fandom: Doctor Who
Disclaimer: All hail the Beeb.
Characters: River Song/Martha Jones
Rating: PG
Spoilers: None
Warnings: None
Word Count: 750
Summary: River takes Martha on a trip she's wanted for a long time, and learns something about Earth's history that horrifies her.
Notes: So I lost a bet to
zulu recently, and as payment she demanded a River/Martha ficlet, giving the prompt "51st century curiosities." Since she just handed in her MA thesis today, I thought this would be a good time to post – congratulations!It went against River's better judgement, but Martha had cajoled and pleaded until she finally gave in with as much grace as possible. "All right," she'd said, and Martha had flung her arms around River and kissed her. "But," River had warned, "you don't touch anything, you don't take anything, and you do not talk to anyone other than me unless absolutely necessary." Martha had nodded frantically, and now, here they were.
River brushed non-existent dirt off her coat and looked at Martha, checking that both of their disguises were put together properly. Martha smiled back, excitement shining in her eyes. River nodded, Martha pushed open the doors, and, all but unnoticeable in their short white labcoats, they walked together into the lobby of the Royal Denebian Hospital, Martha nearly dancing in anticipation of finally getting to explore the world of 51st Century medicine.
**
When they left, hours later, River was almost worn out; Martha, though, was bright and cheerful, as if being in the hospital had transported her back to her residency and the ability to stay awake around the clock. She was bubbling over with comments and questions, some of which River had no answer for, though she tried hard to keep up.
"It's so strange," Martha was saying, "to be in a hospital that didn't smell like disinfectant!"
"Mm," River agreed. "That's the decontamination shields."
"I know," Martha crowed. Beaming, she bounced through the quiet streets of New Londinium. "It's just amazing to see all the technology in person!" Quieting, she hooked an arm through River's. "I thought," she said after a moment's silence, "that everything would be different. That I'd come out having seen all the new shiny advances in medicine and never want to go back to the Royal Free."
River had worried about the same thing; it had been a large part of her reluctance to sneak Martha into the hospital in the first place. "And now?" she asked, more lightly than she felt. "Going to give it all up and join me as a space pirate?"
Martha giggled and tugged River closer, swaying into her. "Hardly! No, what really impressed me is how many of the techniques and treatments I learned are still in use here. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, there are remedies we use that've been around for centuries. Somehow I expected to find 21st Century medicine as outdated and wrong as... as... as the Victorian treatments for hysteria."
They'd reached River's rented flat by now; she stopped with the door halfway open and stared at Martha. "Treatment for hysteria?" she repeated. "What, you mean besides a good slap?"
Martha pushed past into the kitchen and put the kettle on. "It's funny now, although it wasn't for a long time, but hysteria used to be seen as a derangement of the womb – men never got emotional, of course." She pulled a face. "So in order to encourage the uterus to settle down – like, they actually thought it came detached and wandered around the body – doctors used to apply manual stimulation to calm women through hysterical paroxysm." She raised her eyebrows suggestively.
River stared, thunderstruck, letting her white coat drop onto a chair. "You can't be serious. You mean..." She trailed off, unwilling to finish the thought.
Martha nodded matter-of-factly. "Literally manual, at first." She wiggled her fingers. "Later – well, let's just say that the steam-powered exhibits in history of medicine museums put me off sex toys for a good few years."
"Tragic," River murmured. "Sometimes, your era amazes me."
"Hey, hey, not mine. We've moved past that, believe me." Martha reached into a cabinet for the mugs. "Cuppa?"
River looked at Martha, standing in the middle of the kitchen with her white lab coat still on, and smirked. She padded up to Martha and took the mugs out of her hands, setting them on the counter. "Actually, Doctor," she purred, running her fingers over the lapels of Martha's coat, "I'm feeling terribly overwrought all of a sudden. I don't think tea could possibly relax me. Do you know any other ways to help me... calm down?"
It took Martha a moment to catch up; then she grinned wickedly. "Why, Miss Song," she said, "I'm happy to help. I think I know exactly what you need. Why don't you come in here and lie down..."
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:13 pm (UTC)"But," River had warned, "you don't touch anything, you don't take anything, and you do not talk to anyone other than me unless absolutely necessary."
Dunno! Like the way it rolls off the tongue, and how it contrasts with the sweetness of River taking Martha on this trip.
Victorian treatments for hysteria: always a welcome fic element. ;D
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:29 pm (UTC)Victorian treatments for hysteria: always a welcome fic element.
I AGREE :D
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:32 pm (UTC)Yeah! I don't know River-- I haven't seen her episodes and this is the first fic I've read about her-- but I do like a practical gal. So the intro to your fic, and my first real view into her, made me like her on the spot. ♥
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:39 pm (UTC)But eeee, it makes me beam that my fic makes you like her even without really knowing her! :DDD
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:42 pm (UTC)Zulu has done a lot of the prep work-- namely, OMG RIVER IS AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME-- but, yeah, your fic has convinced me she's right. ;D
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:49 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:34 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:39 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:54 pm (UTC)Aww, and they are cute together, and I can totally picture Martha's excitement! YAY.
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 04:00 pm (UTC)Hearing that I got the voice right is one of my favourite things ever, so thank you! :D And I'm glad you enjoyed it! (Based on the feedback, River/Martha is a surprisingly popular pairing, so maybe I should get on finishing that other fic, hee.)
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 08:32 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-16 09:08 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-17 03:21 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-17 04:09 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:17 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:25 pm (UTC)And thank you very much for the comment! :D I'm glad this came at an opportune time. ;)
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:29 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:29 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:41 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:48 pm (UTC)"What, you mean besides a good slap?"
<3 <3 <3
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 03:57 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 05:30 pm (UTC)Thank you SO much!
I do wish people would write more Martha/River (and even some actual smut, please!). I seriously think Alex and Freema would melt the screen if they ever appeared on it together... (Trying to decide whether to use the Gay for Alex or the Gay for Freema icon... Hmm...)
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 08:42 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-16 05:31 am (UTC)I could definitely use more Martha/River in my life - I think they're a great pairing - so sparky and capable and strong...
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 07:25 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-15 08:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-16 03:51 am (UTC)I LOVED it.
(no subject)
Date: 2010-09-16 09:10 pm (UTC)