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tellitslantI've been turning over in my head for a while a meta post in response to the hatememe chatter going around, because it profoundly disturbs me to see people saying that they feel they can't express their own opinions – and it's not that I'm appalled on behalf of these poor oppressed fans, it's that frankly I think they're creating and inflating injustices to explain themselves. To put it diplomatically. And maybe I don't really have a reason to be saying this, because I don't do the hatememes, nor have I yet been signled out in any sort of meaningful manner, but it's been bothering me and it's really been bothering some of my friends. So. My points basically boil down to this:
If hatememes are about expressing your fannish opinions, then leave people out of them, or have the courage to insult people with your own name behind you. If everyone is running around talking about how fantastic Supernatural is and you hate the show but don't want to harsh your friends' buzz, maybe, or don't want to get mass defriended by these newly-obsessed people who talk about other interesting stuff too? Well, honestly, I think you're missing the point of a fannish community if you think a dissenting opinion is an automatic ticket to pariah-land, but whatever. Post "OMG I never want to see Jensen Ackles on my flist again ever!!1!" in a hatememe, fine.
But the moment you make a personal attack on a fan by name, then you're done. You are finished. You have left the already miniscule realm of what might be acceptable anon chatter. There is absolutely no excuse for rudeness in a medium where it is so incredibly easy to avoid people you don't like. Anon posts favour the accuser by failing to give onlookers the chance to understand which and how many people espouse the negative opinion. It prevents the accused from defending herself. And it is just bad fucking form, especially the lengths to which some of the posts I saw went. Attacking mental illnesses – which I saw in two different, totally unconnected fandoms? No excuse. Debating histories of abuse? No excuse. Smearing someone due to her sexual orientation? Absolutely no fucking excuse, especially in this particular community. Do it with your name attached or don't do it at all. I promise I will tell you to your face if I don't like you, believe me.
And you know what? Don't ever shut your mouths. I mean it. If you're in fandom and you're not talking or are agreeing with opinions that aren't actually yours, for the sake of creating harmony – then you're just missing the point. Get involved. Be loud. How on earth else do you ever expect to get to know anyone? The best part of fandom is all the smart people in it – if I disagree with you about something, then I want to be able to discuss it with you. Maybe you'll change my mind, maybe I'll change yours, maybe we'll continue to disagree. But the discussion is the fun part.
I… wanted to be a lot more eloquent than that, because I thought the hatememes were fucking hilarious when they first showed, and then I watched them turn disturbingly ugly. I didn't quite make the points I wanted, but I tried.
And now as a highly appropriate followup, my next post will contain porn.
If hatememes are about expressing your fannish opinions, then leave people out of them, or have the courage to insult people with your own name behind you. If everyone is running around talking about how fantastic Supernatural is and you hate the show but don't want to harsh your friends' buzz, maybe, or don't want to get mass defriended by these newly-obsessed people who talk about other interesting stuff too? Well, honestly, I think you're missing the point of a fannish community if you think a dissenting opinion is an automatic ticket to pariah-land, but whatever. Post "OMG I never want to see Jensen Ackles on my flist again ever!!1!" in a hatememe, fine.
But the moment you make a personal attack on a fan by name, then you're done. You are finished. You have left the already miniscule realm of what might be acceptable anon chatter. There is absolutely no excuse for rudeness in a medium where it is so incredibly easy to avoid people you don't like. Anon posts favour the accuser by failing to give onlookers the chance to understand which and how many people espouse the negative opinion. It prevents the accused from defending herself. And it is just bad fucking form, especially the lengths to which some of the posts I saw went. Attacking mental illnesses – which I saw in two different, totally unconnected fandoms? No excuse. Debating histories of abuse? No excuse. Smearing someone due to her sexual orientation? Absolutely no fucking excuse, especially in this particular community. Do it with your name attached or don't do it at all. I promise I will tell you to your face if I don't like you, believe me.
And you know what? Don't ever shut your mouths. I mean it. If you're in fandom and you're not talking or are agreeing with opinions that aren't actually yours, for the sake of creating harmony – then you're just missing the point. Get involved. Be loud. How on earth else do you ever expect to get to know anyone? The best part of fandom is all the smart people in it – if I disagree with you about something, then I want to be able to discuss it with you. Maybe you'll change my mind, maybe I'll change yours, maybe we'll continue to disagree. But the discussion is the fun part.
I… wanted to be a lot more eloquent than that, because I thought the hatememes were fucking hilarious when they first showed, and then I watched them turn disturbingly ugly. I didn't quite make the points I wanted, but I tried.
And now as a highly appropriate followup, my next post will contain porn.
